How to Run Effective One-to-One Meetings That Will Increase Trust, Employee Engagement & Team Productivity
Be an outstanding people leader, not a task-based manager
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Bad managers ignore their team members but expect outstanding results. That looks really dumb written down. Who would think like that?
But I know, you know, and anyone who's worked a 9-5 knows that having a manager who doesn't communicate is not only a pain in the arse but also extremely common.
Considering that talking to your team regularly is the most productive way to build a high-performing, effective, and engaged team, ignoring your direct reports is a sure pathway to a failing team.
In my four decades in the workplace, I've seen this play out repeatedly, both as a team member and as a frustrated Learning and Development Manager who encouraging leaders to talk to their direct reports.
Really? Managers don't want to talk to their teams?
Yes, really. One manager told me he'd rather poke his eye out with a burnt stick than sit down and talk one-on-one to his team. You can imagine the extra effort his team would put in for him after a long day. Not much, and I don't blame them.
But you’re reading this newsletter, so you want to excel as a leader and communicate with your team.
So how do we do all this communicating?
One of the easiest ways is through one-to-one meetings. In my years managing teams, I have always held regular one-to-ones, and in every case, I have been able to connect more deeply on a personal level with the team members and coach, advise, guide, and develop them.
If your team isn't used to one-to-one meetings, they might not be keen on the idea initially. But once you've met with them a few times, they'll stop seeing one-to-ones as another bonkers idea from management and see the value.
One of my team members was in his late sixties and was quite bewildered by why we needed a scheduled meeting to chat. He loved to chat, so he had no issues with talking; it was the scheduling bit that confused him. After a few months, he loved the one-to-one meetings because he could depend on a regular meeting slot rather than ad hoc phone calls or a rushed conversations.
One-to-Ones 101 (or 121's 101)
So, what are one-to-ones, anyway?
One-to-one meetings are regular, frequent, private meetings with your team members to discuss productivity, goals, training & development, any issues, and personal concerns.
1. The Power of Privacy
A one-to-one meeting must be private.
If your team member needs to discuss health issues, problems with the team, or a personal matter, such as an impending divorce, they know they can do so in private in their next one-on-one.
No one wants to request an ad hoc meeting with their manager to discuss their upcoming hemorrhoid operation and then have all the nosy parkers on the team ask what the meeting is for.
But I see my team every day! They can talk to me then.
No, they can't, not about confidential matters in an open-plan office. And you might need to know about those confidential matters quick smart if they impact your team.
Action points:
Book in one-to-one meetings with your team members
Ensure you book a private space for the meeting
2. Are You Regular & Frequent?
Like bowel habits, one-to-ones need to be regular and frequent. Many managers assured me that they regularly held team one-to-ones, and in a way, they did. They held one-to-ones regularly every six months.
So, what's an ideal frequency for a one-to-one?
That depends on your team members. A graduate in their first role would need a one-to-one every week. A senior team member might need a one-to-one every fortnight. But no less than fortnightly; otherwise, too many meetings get missed through sickness, holidays, and work emergencies.
And if that happens, your team will lose confidence in the one-to-one process and start canceling the meetings themselves.
How long should one-to-ones go on for?
One-to-ones can go from 30 minutes to an hour, depending on your team member's needs.
One of my team members used to like a long one-to-one, and we often talked for over an hour. He worked in a different location, and having a face-to-face chat was important to him. Another team member had the desk next to me, and we'd usually get through her one-to-ones in under 30 minutes. We'd only take longer if there was an issue to discuss.
When your team members know they'll see you frequently, they'll save any non-urgent issues for their one-on-one discussions, saving you time between meetings.
Action points:
Schedule your one-to-ones with your team members weekly or fortnightly
If you need to cancel a one-to-one, re-book it as soon as possible
3. Cover These Topics & You'll Never Get Any Unpleasant Surprises
Your one-to-ones will run more smoothly if you have a set of questions to work through. You, your team member, and your team member's dog who's at the office for the bring your dog to work day, will all be clear on what is about to happen.
Start the meeting by asking how your team members feel about work and if they need to discuss anything. This is an opportunity for them to bring up any personal or work issues that may be causing stress or upsetting them.
When I'm teaching this material as a course, at this point, all the rough, tough managers howl and scream with horror.
Ask them how they are? Are you mad? I don't want to know how they are; I want them to get on with their work.
Well, as the rough, tough managers say, take a cement pill and harden up. Starting with an inquiry about your team's well-being shows that you care about them as a person.
More howling and screaming and not wanting to know their team member's problems…
Some of us are natural people leaders and enjoy interacting with our teams. If you are more of a 'get the job done' type, don't panic. All you need to do is ask how your direct reports are and if there are any burning issues they want to talk about before you start.
Once you've clarified that your team member is in full working order, you can get on with the worky part.
Ask about your team member’s goals and projects. Discuss progress and whether they are meeting their deadlines. If not, ask if your direct report has any ideas of how to move forward and use that as a jumping-off point for a two-way discussion. If your direct report is stuck, you can use the meeting time for a coaching session.
Are there any roadblocks or missing resources that are preventing goals from being accomplished? If there are tasks that only you can do, such as authorizing funds or access to information, make sure you do them promptly.
Next, discuss your direct report's progress with their training or any other development they are undertaking. If necessary, use the one-to-one to do some coaching.
Once you have discussed their goals and progress, ask your direct report for a rating out of 10 for their engagement and satisfaction with work. If it is low, you can ask if there is anything you can do to improve it.
At the end of the meeting, ask your team members about their workload, how they are, and if there is anything else they want to discuss. Some people struggle to talk to their boss about personal or difficult topics. By the end of the meeting, they may warm up and feel more comfortable.
Action Points:
Create a one-to-one form that covers all the above areas, or use this free guide and form
Bonus tips
As you may have gathered, I'm a massive fan of one-to-ones.
Here are some tips from my experience of holding one-to-ones with my team members:
Explain to the team what you are doing and why before you begin. Team members have told me that they loved the one-to-ones, but they were initially confused because they did not understand the point of them.
Take care to prepare a one-to-one form that works for your team and suits your style. Put it somewhere accessible on the work computer, or you will have people not preparing because they couldn't find the form.
Always re-book canceled one-to-ones. The team grows to rely on them.
Insist that your team replies to calendar invites, and if they cannot make a one-to-one, they must let you know.
Make a note of the actions that your direct report has agreed to do. Note your actions, too.
Diarize agreed-on actions from the one-to-one.
Diarize actions that your direct reports have agreed to so that you can check on progress.
Whenever I emailed a team member to do something, I filed it in an archive file under their name. Before the one-to-one, I looked in their file and listed all the things I'd asked them to do, ready to discuss in the one-to-one. This way, all requests are captured.
Always book a meeting room for your one-to-ones. If someone is in your meeting room and you can't ask them to leave, go to a coffee shop.
One-to-one work on Zoom. You can easily share the one-to-one form.
If you have direct reports who are leaders themselves, check that they are doing their one-to-ones with their team. I had a section in the one-to-one form where the managers summarized their team's activities.
Some of your team will be happy with a half-hour meeting, but some may take longer. People have different needs for social contact, and you must adjust to suit your team. Always allow ample time so your team does not feel rushed.
Have a section at the end of the one-to-one form with development goals and goals from the performance appraisal system. Have your direct report copy and paste the goals onto the form and check on progress regularly.
Summary
I love one-to-ones because they are effective, and I enjoy interacting with team members. Talking to your team frequently in private helps you get to know your team members and their challenges. You'll also be on top of any issues with your team's work as soon as they occur.
One-to-one meetings take time, but in my experience, the benefits far outweigh the investment in time and effort.
Remember, people leave managers, not organizations. One-to-one meetings are a great way to ensure your team is engaged and turnover is low. A high-performing team makes you look good, too.
If you’d like a free one-to-one guide and form, click here.
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